Five Reasons I'm Thankful for My Momma

Mother's Day. A day created with the sole purpose of honoring our mothers and for showing them appreciation for all they have done and continue to do for us.

As I have gotten older, I realize that my mom's role in my life has changed many times. As an infant, her role was to care for my basic needs: food, shelter, clothing. As I grew, those needs continued but more were also added: walking, talking, learning numbers and letters. Yet again, getting older added new responsibilities for her: manners, social skills, life skills.

I look at things that I do each day, and I can see her hand in almost everything. When I make food, I can remember times that she stood with me in the kitchen and taught me to crack an egg, to properly "fold" a mixture together, and how to add just enough flour to dough to keep it from sticking. When I shower, I can think back to the time she taught me to shave my legs (Spencer says thanks!). I drive myself to work with the memories of her teaching me to drive as a teenager, and I interact with people each day and can hear her voice in my head reminding me to say "please," "thank you," and "yes ma'am."

I value her more than she knows, and I certainly do not tell enough just what an impact she has made in my life.

Well, Momma, on this Mother's Day I want to share with you five (of many) reasons that I am so grateful for you.

1. You taught me that "stuff" will not make me happy.
We didn't always get everything we wanted or thought, at the time, that we "needed." At the time, it seemed so unfair. In hindsight, however, I am so glad you did not give in to all of our whims and wishes. It taught me, and my sisters, to be grateful for what we were given, to be content with less, and that using our imaginations could be so much more fun than any store-bought toy. That same imagination now helps me both at work and at home! 

2. I learned the value of family.
At a certain age, it seems all teenagers (females in particular) only want to be with their friends. I am sure all three of us were no exception. I am so appreciative, though, that you taught us how valuable our family is in our lives. You have always been close with your family, and have encouraged us to be close with ours, to "hug it out" - as much as we didn't want to - after a fight, and to remember that family is always family - through arguments, hurt feelings, and hard times. And as I get older, I have found that to all be true. My number of close friends has dwindled to a very special handful, and I see now how my family is always there for me, no matter what. 

3. Thanks to you, I can manage my home.
As a kid, it wasn't always fun to have to clean my room, to do a load of laundry, to make my bed, or to do the dishes. I even was jealous when I had friends who never had to do any of these things. I would think "that's not fair, I have to do so much and your parents do it all for you!" I couldn't see that it was actually the best thing you could have done for me. I learned to appreciate the things I had, to care for them and to keep them in good condition. I also was able to transition much more easily when the time came for me to leave home. Unlike others I knew, I could do my own laundry, keep my living spaces clean and tidy, and to be discontent if things were dirty. As I've gotten older and bought my first home, I feel that (for the most part) I can keep it running in an orderly fashion without overwhelming myself. Thank you for a lifetime of preparation for this valuable skill.

4. I inherited your love of cooking.
As you know, I love to cook! I always have. Remember when I would watch Julia Childs on TV (having no idea what she was saying) and then wanting to go into the kitchen and use any and every ingredient I could find to make, well, nothing? I know I got that from you. I loved to sit in the kitchen and watch you make meals - lasagna, chicken casserole, chili, biscuits and gravy, fried chicken...even cinnamon toast! The conversations and the smells - it all is so special to me. You've taught me a lot of your recipes, and I especially value the biscuit bowl and cutter you passed down to me. I will never use anything else. Thanks to this love of cooking, I can keep my husband (and future children) well fed, and love doing it!

5. You have inspired me to be a mother just like you.
More than anything, I am grateful that you have instilled in me the desire to be like you. Being the youngest, I was allowed some special years with you alone while my sisters were at school. I probably remember more of that time than you realize. You were always around to make ordinary days special (front porch picnics, playing in the leaves, and having water gun fights), to foster my passions and creativity, to give plenty of hugs, help us make memories, and to allow us to be kids while also teaching us valuable lessons. I hope that one day when I have children of my own, that I can be as great of a mother to them as you have been to us. 

Momma, as I've gotten older, I've watched our relationship turn into more of a friendship, and it takes a special mom to be able to let go of her "baby" and accept her as a friend when she grows up. Thank you for allowing me to grow up, and for allowing that process to take place. I hope you know just how much I love you!


Happy Mother's Day!

5 Tips for Being a Good Babysitter's Boss

As a teenager (or even younger for most of us - now people wouldn't even consider letting a 12 year old watch their children!), I had my turn at babysitting. I was never an every-weekend type, but here and there a coworker of my mom's or a neighbor would ask me to watch their kid(s). I was pretty shy, particularly when it came to being in someone else's home. By myself. #awkward.

If you're at the stage in your life where you are hiring babysitters, here are five ways to be sure you're being a good babysitter's boss (I use "boss" for lack of a better word, since you're the person paying for the service).

1. Feed your babysitter something specific.
Don't tell them "help yourself." While it's very generous and genuine of you to say so, many people in your home don't feel comfortable rummaging through your pantry and refrigerator for food. Instead, make them a specific meal if they're staying during mealtime. Having them make a frozen pizza is fine - just let them know what you intend for them to eat. If you want to welcome them to snacks, leave a basket of snacks to choose from out on the counter. That way it is all in clear sight, and they don't have to go looking through your cabinets and other things.

2. Leave written instructions for anything that might be confusing.
Sure, you'll walk them around and give them instructions before you leave, but your babysitter, particularly if it's his or her first time in your home, will likely not remember everything you say. Instead, if you need to instruct them on how to operate the 16 remotes to your TV (so they can occupy themselves when the kids go to bed), leave instructions on the coffee table. Have a security alarm? Definitely leave instructions for this. Some people may panic at the thought of accidentally setting it off, so having something to look at to arm/disarm is great.

3. Disclose any pets up front.
Usually, babysitters won't mind terribly having to feed a dog or your goldfish. There are instances, however, when this could be a problem. You definitely don't want to wait until he or she shows up to your house to figure this out! Some may suffer from allergies (like myself - very allergic to cats!), while others may have a fear of certain animals. Sometimes, the animal itself may be welcome, but your specific animal may be too much for them (sorry, but you know who you are. Sometimes animals are just out of control and it's only endearing to you!). It's not fair to ask them to babysit one child, when the animal makes it feel like 3. Just be considerate.

4. Be home when you say you will.
This one is important. Not only is coming home on time important, but you don't know what else your babysitter has planned for that day or night. It is not fair to assume that they have blocked off their entire night for you and your children, when they actually may have plans to meet with a friend, or to go home and get some school work done. Just as you would always be on time for business meetings or doctor appointments (or at least call with an apology if you know you're running late), your babysitter deserves the same courtesy.

5. Don't ask your babysitter what they want to be paid.
Aaaawkward. Sure, this is a dream question for us to be asked at work, but for a 15 year old, they want as much as you'll give them! Duh. Odds are, however, they'll probably ask for too little. And you don't word getting around that you're the parents taking advantage of cheap labor. If you're hiring babysitters, it's your responsibility to keep up with what the average hourly rate is in your area. Talk to other parents that you're comfortable with, and ask what they pay on average. I know that seems to be a personal question, but this is something you'll want to stay on top of if you want to find ready and willing people to come watch your kids when you need them. Also, be sure to pay extra when warranted. These instances could include: asking them to watch a pet; if they end up watching the neighbor's kid, too; if you arrive home late; if you expect them to tutor your child during homework; if you ask them to do household chores; etc.


These tips are taken from my experiences growing up, and trust me, my friends and I did talk about our experiences babysitter - the good, the bad and the ugly. We wanted to let others know when they should turn down a job for various reasons, so be sure that you're making your babysitters feel comfortable and valued. They will return the favor, trust me. And if there's ever anyone you want to treat well, isn't it someone who keeps your children safe and cared for when you can't be there to do so?


What other tips would you add for parents?


Until next time - -